notwithstanding the foregoing

kickdrumheart:

giganticism:

kickdrumheart:

giganticism:

kickdrumheart:

guise, i want SUITS fic where harvey litterally purchases mike with money. a lot of money.

it’s all i want in the world.

What, like Mike’s an escort? Or like he owns him? Or — or maybe you should just tell me more about this…

well not like really OWNS him, that’d actually be creepy, because human trafficking is bad, but i guess what i want is for harvey to be paying mike $750,000 to pretend to be his husband because of Reasons and they’re not having sex, just all of the sexual tension, but then they fall in love and really are together and mike tries to give the money back but harvey is all, LOL i have millions keep it.

it will contain every one of my favorite tropes - mike pointing out that harvey is a ridiculous human man. harvey buying mike suits and other clothes and taking him for a real hair cut and to nice restaurants. and mike pretends to be all, do you know how many people we could be helping with this money we’re spending on salmon foam and bespoke socks and harvey becomes a better person and mike learns that wearing $250 cologne is just nicer.

alternate version is the one where they immediately begin sleeping together even though mike is all, i am not an escort and you are not paying me for sex i am just throwing it in as a free gift with purchase.

in either version, louis suspects that mike and harvey aren’t actually in love or are friends or have known each other for longer than a week and he is right, obvs, but everyone thinks he’s just jealous of one or both of them, which he is, obvs.

girl, i don’t know. i just need it.

I was about to try to throw out some more detail suggestions but then I realized it was just turning it into a “Pretty Woman” AU. Which I would read. So basically I agree with your desire to have Harvey giving Mike lots of money for his time.

Oh! And slightly different — I would also enjoy a “Sabrina” AU, where maybe Mike thinks he has a crush on Harvey’s younger brother (who may or may not be fake in canon, but whatever), which is fine until Harvey’s play boy brother starts paying attention back despite how he’s supposed to marry into another powerful family. Harvey basically throw piles of money at Mike to just go to Paris or wherever makes more sense for Mike, blah blah blah, and eventually Harvey and Mike actually just fall in love with each other.

which ties back neatly to the “daddy longlegs” au wherein harvey meets mike once and then anonymously pays for him to go to law school and mike writes emails and post cards to this mysteriou scholarship fund and donna saves them all but harvey never reads them. harvey goes to a family weekend at harvard and watches mike with jenny and trevor and he goes over and can’t resist talking to him and harvey lies and says he wants to talk about careers so mike will have dinner with him. and then when mike graduates harvey convinces jessica to hire him and they work together and fall in love. and harvey buys mike suits.

I have never watched this show, but all these AUs sound delightful. 

Maybe it’s just because I like a Pretty Woman AU, and also Sabrina and Daddy Long Legs.